I recently attended a career fair here in Delaware and saw or heard many of the scenarios outlined below. A few I added from other career fair experiences, but not many! This is no commentary on Delawareans or those seeking to work in Delaware – I commonly see and hear many of these egregious examples at job fairs I attend across the region.
If you don’t want to be hired by attending a career fair:
- Bring your child/children (no matter how young, old, cute, well behaved, calm, mature). No one, not the children, you, other attendees, or employers will benefit.
- Bring your dog. Everyone can hear it barking from the car in the parking lot, including you! It’s never a good idea to leave your dog alone in the car anyway.
- Ask about benefits and raises. Everyone wants them – this can be discussed closer to the job offer.
- Wear knee high stockings with a skirt, even a long one – the split is above the stocking line and clearly visible from behind, in case you wondered.
- Tell a recruiter/potential employer you don’t want to “waste” a resume on them – bring enough to waste on every employer there and then some. You don’t know from where your next job offer will come yet.
- Wear jeans, shorts, t-shirt, muscle shirt or ill-fitting, or bad looking clothing. Ask someone whose opinion you care about how you look – they will tell you.
- Wear pink sunglasses to match with your capri’s that have a large embroidered pink flower on the leg. This is good advice on any day.
- Wear perfume or smoke what smells like an entire pack of cigarettes before attending. Many people are allergic to perfumes and no one likes the smell of stale cigarette smoke.
- Leave your glasses at home if you need them to read. What? You really didn’t think you would have to read anything at the job fair?
I hope this clears things up!
For some positive tips on making the most of out a career fair, you may also want to review the following sites:
- http://www.quintcareers.com/career_fair_resources.html
- http://www.quintcareers.com/job_career_fairs.html
- http://www.careerbuilder.com/jobseeker/careerfairs/careerfairtips.aspx
This article was meant to be tongue in cheek and not to offend anyone. That having been said, if you are guilty of any of the preceding: Don’t do it again! Good luck on your job search.
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Along the same theme, the late, great comedian George Carlin had a list of ways to ‘ensure’ you’ll get the job you want (edited for content):
- Tell the hiring manager you cannot start for 6 months but that you *must* be paid immediately.
- Ask what their policy is regarding Monday & Friday absenteeism
- Ask for a desk near the door so you can get right out at 5:00PM
- and if you think the interview is going bad, point to picture on the manager’s desk and ask ‘Hey, who is the hottie?’
A few more…Wear a suit so ill-fitting that you look like an overstuffed sausage or a skirt so short your behind shows. Wearing a “princess” backpack or headphones and just walking around taking things off of employer tables – classy!
I’d like to add two.
Chomp on your fast food you picked up on the way to the job fair.
Chomp on that complimentary dish provided by job fair sponsors.