T.A.P. Q#458 – I’m Not ‘Warm & Fuzzy’ – Now What?

March 16, 2010 by sparktalk

Dear Experts,

I just found out that I didn’t get a promotion I was up for. My mentor in the company took me out to lunch after I got the news. She told me, “They said you just aren’t warm and fuzzy enough to be a manager.” I was shocked. I am an exceptional worker and have the best performance in my group. I don’t see how being a softy is more valuable than saving the company the kind of money I save them. Part of the reason I’m so successful is because I don’t get all caught up in that touchy-feely crap so many other employees feel they need to be happy at work. To me, you should come to work, do your job and leave the emotion at home. It’s worked for me great until now. So my question is: Should I start looking for a new job where I’ll get promoted without having to be ‘warm and fuzzy’ or is this something I’m going to run into more at the higher levels of management?

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Here is how our CAREEREALISM-Approved Experts answered this question on Twitter:

Q#458 You will definitely need to develop people skills to advance; read HarvBizRev/Wharton information regarding leadership. (@juliaerickson)

Q#458 Leaders care – it’s what makes teams want to follow them. Warm/fuzzy doesn’t have to be your stile, but give positive feedback and care. (@resumesrevealed)

Q#458 Change your style! You have to be trusted to get buy-in and loyalty. Can you without being warm & fuzzy? (@avitacareermanagement)

Q#458 This sounds like a company culture issue. Other companies promote based on results alone. (@gradversity)

Q#458 Good leaders inspire. Doesn’t require “warm fuzzy” as much as mutual respect. Engaging others not all touchy-feely. (@DawnBugni)

Q#458 Think of it this way: you are kicking butt in your current job. Why should they promote you out of it? (@beneubanks)

Q#458 Employees are better performers under managers they respect and like. In leadership, soft skills are = too hard. (@EmilyBennington)

Q#458 Strong manager potential = lovable + firm. Sounds like you only use half the equation. I’d work on it. (@jtodonnell)

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Tagged: advice, C-Twips (Career Tips on Twitter!), career, CAREEREALISM, careerrealism, expert, job, Manager, promotion, search, t.a.p.

Comments

Kris Parfitt

If you want to be promoted as a manager, then take a close look at the C-level executives in your field of interest and observe their employee’s level of performance, satisfaction, loyalty and development. Better yet, talk to the employees of this manager and ask them what they respect in that manager’s leadership style. If you find they are happy in their positions and loyal to the company, then you have found a manager who is not only promotable because of people skills, but because he or she understand the true bottom line – happy employees perform, stay put and contribute which impacts equally to the bottom line as business savvy, product placement and sales.

You were passed up for the promotion because you have not demonstrated the second half of management which is people management. As an employee you have demonstrated, in your words, being an exceptional worker and demonstrate best performance in your group. I’m assuming you mean that you get your job done, on time without mistakes - and, apparently, without emotion.

People skills are an important quality in promotable managers. As a manager you are accountable for the overall performance of your staff. That accountability includes the management and development of your staff’s performance and output. To manage people effectively you are required to demonstrate successful and effective skills in empowerment, coaching, leading and training people. The hard-skills of business are required for managers – budgets, products, processes and analysis. What is also required of promotable managers are soft-skills and a practiced knowledge of human development, which is more complex than business processes.

Because you’re unwillingness to see the value of how both sides of management saves a company money demonstrates to your boss that you are not ready to lead in their organization. If you are managing your staff as a robot, people will leave which will cost the company a lot of money. The “crap” you would be required to demonstrate to be a promotable manager will continue to be “crap” as long as you view management from the confines of an unemotional worker.

If that is your wish, I recommend you steer clear of management and consider promotions in the area of individual contributor where you are not required to manage humans but instead be accountable only for your own performance.