Ways Women Sabotage Careers

3 Ways Women Can Sabotage Their Careers

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Imagine the following scenario: You walk into the office, just days after your promotion. You’re happy you’ve upgraded to a new office, a better parking spot, and a better salary. You’re proud of yourself, and you should be, you’ve worked really hard for this.

So, why are the rest of the women in the office whispering to themselves when you walk by? Why have they suddenly stopped inviting you to lunch? And why is there a nasty rumor about how you “really” got your promotion, spreading around the office like wild fire? It’s called relational aggression and it’s just one of the many ways women can sabotage their careers.

Ways Women Can Sabotage Their Careers

Leadership and strategic communications consultant, Susan Tardanico, shares some of the ways women can impair their careers, and potential ways on how to fix those problems:

1. Relational Aggression

As I already described above, relational aggression is when women work to sabotage other women in the workplace. The typical catty syndrome, where women are competitive in all of the wrong ways. “Behaviors include things like backstabbing, gossip, rumor-mongering, bullying and icing people out,” said Tardanico. “This not only hurts women, but it’s a turnoff to many men, too, and can prevent a woman from moving up in her career.”

Though there’s been a significant rise in entrepreneurship, there still seem to be gender gaps in those leadership positions, particularly in the U.S. That being said, one would expect more women to help each other in the workplace, but instead, they tend to criticize and even sabotage each other.

2. The Good Girl Curse

Though this certainly doesn’t apply to all women out there, that doesn’t mean this problem doesn’t exist. I, myself, am guilty of falling victim to the ‘good girl’ syndrome. As Tardanico describes, the ‘good girl’ curse stems from years of messages that tell women they shouldn’t “rock the boat, [they should] get along with others, be the peacemaker, don’t talk back, be selfless and soft-spoken, make friends,” said Tardanico.

Though these routines seem okay when one is younger, Tardanico states that these types of attitudes can be harmful in the workplace. There are several situations when capable women work hard on projects in the workplace, but at the first sign of challenging feedback, the good girl retracts and forgets all about her research, all to avoid conflict or confrontation.

3. The Impostor Syndrome

We’ve all carried feelings of self-doubt, it’s in our nature as human beings. However, with the impostor syndrome, it’s more than just self-doubt. It’s “a condition of such deep rooted insecurity that we feel like we’re an impostor – faking how good we really are,” said Tardanico. “And deep inside, we’re afraid that someday, someone is going to realize the truth – that we are really incompetent and undeserving of our position – and our dirty secret will be out.”

Such strong feelings of self-doubt can cause employees to sabotage their careers by not striving for promotions simply because they don’t believe that they can, or they become “intense micromanagers” which can make an employee susceptible to burning out quickly because they are constantly trying to “overcompensate for their lack of confidence,” said Tardanico.

Fortunately, there are solutions to these problems, and it all begins with recognizing these behaviors. “In all three cases, awareness is a crucial first step,” said Tardanico. “Often, women don’t realize that these sabotaging thought and behavior patterns are within their control… they can make a new choice.”

Search within yourselves. If you have any of these behaviors in the workplace and it’s negatively impacted your career, find out what’s keeping you from excelling at your talents and actively seek to make changes for a more positive, successful career.


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Photo Credit: Shutterstock

Belen Chacon

Belen is a journalism graduate student at California State University, Northridge. She spends her time interning wherever she can and tweeting her heart out. You can follow her @journobelen.

56 comments

  1. Interesting to read this .

    The first three comments read to me like part of a clever way to get the discussion started. In these postings are so many examples of the types described by the author, that I retrospectively must congratulate her/him, even though at the beginning I did not see much value in it.

    I can only say, forget about gender, consider yourself a person, not male or female; do your job well and ignore all the other rubbish that others might interpret into your gender. However this means you need to act like a person and not like a male or female character.

    One only becomes equal if one behaves accordingly.

  2. Is it just me or did anyone else notice this is a grad student, who is a semi professional intern that also tweets. Not exactly someone that you would want to take career advice from…

    • I really don´t think your comment is fair in any ways. do you know if it is the second degree she is doing at university? do you know anything about her background, talents, aspirations? Maybe she is just passionate about all that – and what she wrote (by the way a book review, so no point in thinking she has invented what she wrote..) was in no way bad.

      I went to university with 25 only, as I left home with 16 and didn´t have the means to do it earlier. Does that mean all the experience I gained from 16 to 25 working in offices was worth nothing?

      I wish you that you see that just judging people doesn´t really bring anything positive.
      All the best

    • DR. BONNER, JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE TITLE AS A DR. DOESN’T MEAN YOUR ANY BETTER TO TAKE ADVICE FROM. THIS GIRL ACTUALLY PUT TIME AND EFFORT INTO HER WORK. I’VE SEEN MANY DR.’S WHO HAVE GIVEN TERRIBLE ADVICE. SO IT WOULD BE APPRECIATED IF YOU KEPT YOUR OPPINION ON WHO I SHOULD TAKE ADVICE FROM TO YOURSELF. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

  3. I have experienced hateful women many times on almost all my jobs with a female boss. It is not easy being attractive and smart, but a few jobs back I decided I would be me and they would have to deal with themselves. I enjoy being nice and supportive and being who I feel like I should be. If being nice is too much for evil people to handle, is that really my problem? or is it theirs?

    It’s up to them to examine themselves and see that they are the ones that have an issue. The truth be told they wish they could be like the person they secretly covet. The sad part is that I believe that every woman (and man) has something special to bring to the table – if only they would recognize and embrace it instead of looking around at everyone else and comparing/dismissing themselves.

    My success strategy is simply this: be myself, enjoy myself, pray for others as I identify their issues, and repeat. If it becomes unbearable, then I leave. If I need to address things, then I do – that is if I think addressing the issue will actually resolve it. If I don’t see that it will, then I use wisdom as to when/what to do and begin to plan my route of escape. I don’t have to tolerate ugly.

    • I tried to find the best place to comment on my advice against bullying. The bullying happened about 16 years ago. The incident has come up in thoughts in order to apply lessons from it. There were mostly all women I worked with and they did seem to be cliquish, snicker and suddenly stop talking when I walked into the room. they did not hide they were talking about me and judging. I had not been rude to any of them. It was highschool or worse. A couple of them were just the worst type of woman who were likely to cause this type of atmosphere regardless. I was let go. I was not glad to be let go at the time.
      Strong advice that applies:
      Being unemployed is uncomfortable, full of self doubt and insecurities. Change is constant. The next job will be better. Do not settle for a bad set of people to work with. Every set of people you work with will be different. Everytime I got a new job the pay went way up, even though I did not believe or know it could go up. It will go up. It’s risky to move on, but move on! Life has very many choices to it. Try an avenue before you judge it. Take the leap of faith, get a new job, and another one until you enjoy doing it every day. Do not waste your years. It doesn’t matter how you get your foot in the door, it will turn into success. Change is the key.
      I have been thought of highly since that job, thus the imposter problem. (Except for this one social group of adults, men and women who like me as a scape goat to gossip about. I took it hard because of how much I had trusted the adults, older than me, to be experienced and kind, and wise. I have a great support system and I can laugh a lot at them, but not to their faces. If I go back, I expect a mob, but I believe I am not only right, generous and not guilty, I think I deserve gratitude and respect! Not important, just adds to my background.) (Which leads me to my next advice about putting a positive spin on it and confidence.)
      Not everyone is naturally able to feel confident and believe in being who they are. I believe that with enough confidence and doing things for the right reasons you can change the people around you, but moving on is much more rewarding, in my experience. Anything can be spinned positively or looked at with humour.
      So, thank God for being fired so you can get forced into the uncomfortable unemployment that you would have avoided, being forced to reinvent yourself. There are many positives in failures. (I didn’t proof read this as much as I would have liked to.)

  4. I have experienced hateful women many times on almost all my jobs with a female subordinate. It is not easy being attractive and smart, but a few jobs back I decided I would be me and they would have to deal with themselves. I enjoy being nice and supportive and being who I feel like I should be. If being nice is too much for evil people to handle, is that really my problem? or is it theirs?

    It’s up to them to examine themselves and see that they are the ones that have an issue. The truth be told they wish they could be like the person they secretly covet. The sad part is that I believe that every woman (and man) has something special to bring to the table – if only they would recognize and embrace it instead of looking around at everyone else and comparing/dismissing themselves.

    My success strategy is simply this: be myself, enjoy myself, pray for others as I identify their issues, and repeat. If it becomes unbearable, then I leave. If I need to address things, then I do – that is if I think addressing the issue will actually resolve it. If I don’t see that it will, then I use wisdom as to when/what to do and begin to plan my route of escape. I don’t have to tolerate ugly.

  5. I totally agree. I was a victim of sabotage in the workplace by a group of women who wanted another person in my position. It’s amazing how they can conspire together to get what they want. Women can be very cruel and can convince management of anything when they want something. Eventually I was let go but the person they wanted was not put into management at this time. Eventually the company did see that it wasn’t me that was the problem and hired me back in another position. It is ashame that women do not support each other in the workplace.

  6. Beautiful write up, great lesson. No one can satisfy everyone not even in ur private buisness not to talk of public establishment. Notwithstanding, for effectiveness and efficiency at work, a woman needs to look at d star not the bar. Do something that makes u unique.be humble and be productive no matter the obstacles, make extra miles ability to get things done, be a leader and not a driver, av a consistent personalty & always remember that attitude plus aptitude bring success. Humility stops problem, if not 100% but 99.9%.

  7. Only you can sabotage your career. It’s all in how you handle the situation as a professional. Also it’s your thoughts and how you perceive the inner you. Yes something’s need to be addressed as well some people but for the most part stand your ground either way you as an individual choose to handle it. Take from me every scenario is one to learn from. Have a good day today business world!

    • I agree with TSH. It’s how you respond. Stand your ground. Address the situation. Be confident, articulate your view. Learn from the situation. Move forward. When asked about the incident, I simply dismiss it and change the subject. If it is something that needs to be addressed properly…then I readdress it, in the proper forum. Don’t gossip. Be a professional, you will be respected as one.

    • Unfortunately, it’s not all in how you handle a situation. Frankly it’s not in your thoughts, how you perceive yourself or even in your mental disposition. It has everything to do with how management, or your boss, perceives you vs. the person griping about you. I was dismissed from a job due to hearsay, and I was not given an opportunity to rebut nor even told what it was that I had done, not done, or said. My boss simply told me we were finished, and gave an appropriate severance in accord with current legislation. In my view, however, I would not want to continue working with these people, who were always nice to my face while stabbing me in the back who knows how many times. I consider he did me a huge favour by letting me go.

  8. I believe that what was considered women being catty is now workplace bullying. Men can bully too but in a different way. I too lost my job recently due to a staff member being catty and a staff member (my daughter-in-law) joining in a then being given my job whilst I was moved sideways. I will go to my grave knowing I did not do anything wrong and did my best in the workplace and supported those that undermined me to the best of my ability. I am still suffering from depression related to the treatment I received from what I considered my supportive colleagues and executive.

    • Dear Rhonda,

      The exact same thing happened to me, but it wasn’t my daughter-in-law thankfully!! I know exactly how you feel, I have been crying and re-living moments. I am now trying hard to move on with my life, but I’m worried about whether or not I will be able to find another job and whether this job loss with haunt me. I’m so sorry to hear about your predicament and wish you all the best.

  9. I’m sorry but really, a grad student writing an article on how women sabotage their careers??! The outcome of this article only raises more questions, and provides NO answers. Almost all the women who wrote responses need sound advice on how to proceed forward w/ their next job interview, workplace environment recommendations, red flags to look for, etc. etc.

    • Ha. Yep. I felt the same way. Grad student with no work experience… Anyway I work in an office where there is a girl who is catty towards me. IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. And quite frankly the position I am striving for…she has…and she doesn’t do well wtih because SHE has other career goals and isn’t focused on her current job. Why shouldn’t an employer look at a detail like that? And give another person an opportunity to develop the skills they would like to have… I’m very frustrated. I am not getting the appropriate professional development or skill set that I need because I keep getting put to the way side by my employer…and favoritism is shown to this girl who is not doing her job well at all. Can someone say bad politics?

      • CW,

        It seems that you are one of the people who is ready to gossip and put down this other person’s abilities without her being able to defend herself in this forum.

        Maybe you need to concentrate on your own strengths and get a dose of humility. You want to succeed while someone else fails.

        By the way, the author of this article was able to foster a relevant discourse about workplace bullying. Therefore, why should her credentials be questioned. All advice is to be listened to and then processed by a rational mind. Tearing the author down just demonstrates your tendency to join in with the office chatterers.

        • I think CW was asking for helpful advice if anyone has any. That was the main part that I heard in her post.
          Again, the grad student comment, was it checked that she has not had a job from age 15? I look like a teenager practically in some of my recent photos, but I am turning 47 soon.
          I think it is also possible to become experienced by learning from other people’s hard times. If one is able to accurately put yourself in others’ shoes, you might get to learn a lesson the easier way?
          Now I have to get to some advice from my bullying experience.

      • I would have to say that you are definitely one of the catty women that kills progress in the workplace. You should be focusing on your own work and ensuring your work is noticed. If you can’t move up based on this; identify the skills you need to improve on and take the necessary corrective action. You have no idea exactly what this other girl does in her role; sabotaging her by spreading rumors and acting on your jealous tendacies hurts her, the company and in the long term, yourself (even if you “win” and push her out the door)… Eventually, your desire to rise in this way rather than improving yourself will catch up to you… So, stop sabotaging this other lady and pursue your dreams the right way… Don’t allow yourself to be trapped in this expected behavior of women… We as women need to understand that there truly is room for more than one intelligent woman in any professional enviroment….Help each other, build each other up and rise about the catty, destructive behavior… Again, your behavior is not good for the other lady, your team, your company or yourself…

    • It’s not like she hid the fact that she is a grad student, Leslie. If you have nothing to add then don’t read it and don’t comment on it. I think you might even be a catty culprit. How much work experience does she have? Maybe she looks young for her age or it’s an old picture. I suggest you look at it from a grad student’s point of view or interview her privately before you bother to take part in this discussion at all. The article started some interesting discussion.

      I also learned the hardway to not trust all the women in the workplace, I ended up losing my job. (I appreciate the vulnerability of some posts here. Thank you.) Now back to less self sabotage.

      I apologize if I misinterpreted or interupted the topics too much, I get uppity if I notice any public insults.

      • Kimberly Patterson

        SB,

        I am so glad you wrote this! These negative comments represent the attitudes and behaviors that cause problems in (and out of) the workplace. Instead of supporting and lifting one another up as we should, these posts serve no purpose other than to be hurtful and spiteful.

        I have read articles that I’ve found lacking or unhelpful, but never felt the need to reply with criticism. What happened to “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all?”

        • Thanks! It’s great to get positive feedback. It will help to keep me more likely to stand up for someone who is wronged publically in the future. I think we are all always changing and all experiences make some change in the universe in ways we will probably never know about. Which brings me to my advice for bullying that I am about to share from my personal experience.
          I have to stick up for someone else too right now on this discussion.

  10. I agree that men and women can be bullies and both can self-sabatoge, but this article really struck a chord with me. 

    I was recently let go after seven years from my position as a placement director with a staffing agency. I worked in an office of women and commented to friends on several occasions that I was surprised at how well we all got along. This was usually met with skepticism. 

    I felt that we were a team and were all there for the success of the company. I went  out of my way to help and support everyone in the office, picked up the slack when a mistake was made by someone else, and gave credit and praise generously. I was under the impression that this is how a team worked. Yes, there were times that I was “thrown under the bus” by a colleague, but when I called her on it she always denied having done anything. Often I heard many of my ideas being successfully pitched to the boss by that same person. When I spoke with my employer about this, her response was that I was being petty for wanting the credit. I could go on and on now that I have the benefit of hindsight…

    Then a month prior to my being let go, our intern pulled me aside on her last day to tell me to watch my back and to “not trust anyone at the company.” She said that she saw all that I did for my colleagues  and felt that she owed it to me to let me know that I was the only one doing this.

    Sure enough, there was a closed door meeting between the boss and the chief offender and I was out of a job. In case you are wondering if there was more to this than I am letting on, I assure you this was not the case. I’m not saying I was the perfect employee, but I was well liked by our clients and our employees that we placed (many have contacted me since this happened to tell me this.) My productivity was higher than anyone else that had previously held my position and I earned multiple awards and bonuses. The bottom line is that there was A LOT of petty behavior and backstabbing  going on but I didn’t see it until it was too late.  

    It is a shame that so many women in the workforce think that the only way to get ahead is by knocking someone else down.  When I find my next position I will continue to be helpful and supportive, but I will not make the mistake that everyone else operates the same way. 

    • Thanks Kimberly!! You wrote almost exactly what recently happened to me after 10 years of employment. I too will be much smarter with my next job. I still believe in the core values I brought to my job and will continue to stand up for myself and what I believe in. I trusted my new woman supervisor and she found a way to eliminate me within 6 months! She actually would steal things off my desk and hide them!! Talk about the 16 year old coming out.

      • Wow, stealing things off your desk? This is crazy, but not surprising… I have reported to 5 women and 2 men in my career and have received only two promotions even though in 3 of the other cases, I did all of my work and my manager’s work, only to have them say they really loved my work, I was so valubale and they were working on a promotion for me… bull!!!! Who do you think the two promotions were from — yes, the men… and for those of you who think it’s because I was sleeping with them, I am very overweight, average looks and have a beautiful loving family, so no, this wasn’t the case… The real case is that from my experience, the men were willing to recognize my talents, use them and reward me for them. Maybe not because they were great people, but because they understood that they would also shine if they could promote the fact that they recruited good people for the company’s talent pool… Women on the other hand, loved my work, complimented me, gave me all of their work, bragged on me in private, talked about me behind my back and eventually sabotaged me… The moment Senior Mgn would start to recognize my work, the my women managers would swiftly start finding ways to target me. I learned from these lessons and I am much more guarded because of it… I like to think we are all there to help each, share knowledge and promote each others’ strenghths while learning from each other as well… The older I get, the more I realize, hello you are the only one acting like this, so stop shooting yourself in the foot…lol.. lessons learned…

    • I have learned after falling in the hole many,many,times that I can not change others but I can change the way I feel and react to others and this is not gender specific.Sometimes I am better at this than other times, that’s just being a person.

    • Good Luck to you Kimberly, I’m sorry about what happened to you. Something very similar happened to me. It still effects my ability to get a good job. I am 60 now and think its a bit too late to go back to school.

  11. These situations do exist. In the case of “catty syndrome”, it’s just the way some women act. Some men have obnoxious behaviors, but they tend to be different.

    However, I haven’t figured out how catty syndrome is a form of self-sabotage like the other two.

    • I certainly do not think men are different. I work in IT, and many men will behave exactly like this, if they feel jeolous and wish they got the position you did. Too bad we don’t work for the benefit of the organization instead of our selfish selves.

    • I don’t believe it’s self sabatoge either. They are not usually punished in any way for their behavior because they are the NT majority. The person who loses here is the victim.

  12. I am appalled by some of these comments. The article is about women who sabotage their careers not about men who sabotage their’s or about how some women are bullied or about stereotypes. If you’re interested in those topics, I suggest your write your own article or look for one with that headline. But for now this article is about sabotage. People need to start reading articles thoroughly and stop focusing on one little sentence or word and making a big deal about it. All these negative comments are just proof of how you are all sabotaging your careers. Get a grip. Peace out.

    • AS A PSYCHOTHERSPIST and former corporate employee I love your question. It is one of my specialties working with overachievers. 1. Strive for good enough rather than better than 2. Presence – enjoying the process not the outcome 3. The imposter self is usually a childhood adaptation so hold that kid part of yourself and parent it. 4. Therapy or coaching.

    • Hi there, SB. Let me start off by saying thanks for reading the article. I didn’t get to post this on the article, but here is the suggestion Ms. Tardanico gave me for how to solve the imposter syndrome:

      “Those who suffer from the Imposter Syndrome can begin to evaluate their accomplishments with a dispassionate lens: do a success inventory and determine how much of their success has been due to “luck” versus actual talent and determination. If there is a deeper issue driving the fear of being “unmasked,” then some work needs to be done to get to a place of self-love. Addressing this condition is a journey, but the most important step is recognizing the flawed belief system driving the behavior.”

      I hope this helps. =)

      • It does help, thanks. (I read this in my email earlier and I liked it a lot. I didn’t see who had written it until now. I am just now also reading some of the earlier posts. A friend of mine had sent me the link due to the imposter syndrome.)

  13. What you are explaining is “Workplace Bullying” not “Ways Women Can Sabotage Their Careers”! and in fact what you don’t know sadly its becoming more commonplace in office not only by women, but men too.

    I have watched this happen and its sad that coworkers watch this type of behavior and don’t get involved to stop it in fear they will be the next target. Sadly with women its comes in the form of the insecure, envious little 16 year old when they can’t accept that someone has more talent, education, experience and well liked by colleagues. Its destructive and creates hostile workplaces. This is what you failed to mention and the best ways to not get involved or become victim of it.

    Folks this is another example of getting half truths and somewhat accurate information from a writer who has done limited research and put a savvy headline to it. If you want to know more about this topic please visit http://www.workplacebullying.org.

    • Yep Austin you are right. I always wonder why folks (probably those who truly never have encounter real serious workplace bullying) say that it is all about how you “handle it” they must not understand that when a bully sets their sights on you, likely because you are competent, their intent is indeed to harm and hopefully make you lose your job. Not a one time incident and then it’s over.

      If insidious enough, it will continue and with poor management you will be in constant conflict, abused and then discarded.

  14. While you shed a bit of light on the subject you haven’t really scratched the surface. What I have learned first hand that some women can’t except someone being intelligent, talented or have technical skills and education. This is when the insecure little 16 year old personalities pop up. When they can’t stand when a coworker gets promoted or recognition for hard work, try to sabotage it or take credit for it. I have seen and been a victim of it but its not about “women” only it has a name and its called “workplace bullying”. But yet again as with most of these sites we have college kids being paid to blog or write about subject matter they have not next to one clue about. If you really want to know about it folks I suggest you read “The Bully at Work” by Dr. Gary Namie and visit workplace bullying.org for more info.

    • Yep…..you said it. We can’t allow people to put out inaccurate information about the depth and damage of workplace bullying harassment and not respond to correct it. This is serious and ruins families.

  15. Some of you ladies need to wake up. These issues ARE real and exist in workplaces, I have worked in one corporate organisation where this attitude amongst the women was rife and I can tell you it was not a nice place to work. On the scenario of feeling like an impostor – also true. I am a senior manager with considerable sales and marketing experience, have a fantastic CV and wonderful references, however being unemployed and looking for work brings out all the self doubt and I am working really hard to keep my impostor alter ego under control. Thanks Belen for having the courage to raise these issues. I am sure there are plenty of male issues too but there is no rule that says you have to deal with every scenario in one article!

    • I totally agree! This is a true and valid article. I have been at my place of work for almost 10 years. In order to keep working in this awful, teamless, negative, and two-faced environment, I had to basically shut everyone out except one person that I know I can trust! I trust her because her co-worker told her that she wanted to kill her. That co-worker was terminated and everyone at this place was mad at the victim because the bully got terminated! This is happening! It is real! Protect yourself by making sure you know who is on your side. If they have no loyalty to you…do not talk to them only on a professional level and never tell anyone about your personal successes. Sharing less and working hard will at least keep you working! You may not receive any promotions or friends at work but you should come to work to work!

  16. I think this is actually a very helpful post and not sexist. I have experienced all three syndromes before. Unfortunately, relational aggression is a group mentality that I can either decide to partake in or not. If there are a group of women who choose to exclude other women and criticize anyone who is not in their group, what can be done?

  17. I believe it is important to respond to what is really happening in our workplace regarding the ways both women and men behave with one another. For example, this article from the Wharton School of Business is excellent in terms of explaining why women still earn less money than men which has to do, in large part, with the way we view negotiations. This is important information for us to have in order to make enlightened decisions regarding the changes we want to make. http://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/article.cfm?articleid=2746

  18. Yes, I would also like to know where the three things a man can do to sabotage their careers are…

    Articles like this have no place in contemporary journalism.

    • I completely agree…where are those articles about MEN in the workplace? There is no place for these kinds of articles in the twenty first century. All three scenarios are not gender dependent–they are frankly more dependent on maturity level. We are not in high school any more.

  19. I feel that Susan Tardanico identifies some very relevant topics that career women deal with today. I have see it, been the brunt of these actions and I have fought my own gut reaction to behave in the same shamefull way.

    I appreciate that this topic was brought to light today so we can all analyse our reactions to one another and take a look at the big picture. It really is true that when we let our ego go and help each other we all win in the long term.

  20. The surest way to combat these very real issues between women in the workplace is to openly discuss it and to actively decide to not participate in the negative behaviors which are deeply rooted in the way we are socialized. Women helping other women to succeed without keeping score represents a sea change in attitude but it is happening and women are rising to the challenge because it is smart business to do so. Women see the benefits of helping others find jobs and do their work better. We are born nurturers. When we choose to elevate others women, we are all elevated and the sky is the limit to what is possible. Resist the old stereotypes because they no longer serve us.

    • I completely agree, Bonnie. Such problems can be easily fixed by openly discussing the issues like adults. Obviously this doesn’t apply to all women or they wouldn’t be “rising to the challenge,” as you said. Thanks for reading!

  21. “Typical catty syndrome”- silly sexist thing to write. We live in society not isolation. I’m afraid articles like this that perpetuate negative stereotypes hurt more than help.

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